light hearted relief 18

[gurner]

How many forum members does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and 1 to post that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"

... another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb forum about changing light bulbs be stopped

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this forum

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

1 new forum member to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

 

[Tarwn]

Don't forget the 32 people who would post "I tried all those way to change the light bulb and it still doesn't work" exceopt for the fect that they can't fgure out why their computer won't turn on...or the tv...or the cordless phone...and why is it that all the street lights are out also? Darn lightbulbs...

[sub]01000111 01101111 01110100 00100000 01000011 01101111 01100110 01100110 01100101 01100101 00111111[/sub]

http://www.tiernok.com/

The never-completed website

 

[GlenJohnson]

I'm disapointed. I have yet to see the specs on how many turns it took to take the old bulb out and how many turns to install the new one.



Glen A. Johnson
Johnson Computer Consulting
MCP W2K
glen@johnsoncomputers.us


Want to get great answers to your Tek-Tips questions? Have a look at FAQ219-2884
"The one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it."
Oscar Wilde (1854-1900); Anglo-Irish playwright.

 

[MDXer]

WUT About the 6 l33t lusers who can use NE thing cept Netbonics

L8ter d00d

"Shoot Me! Shoot Me NOW!!!"
- Daffy Duck

 

[dwarfthrower]

And of course the newbie light-bulb users who insist that there must be a faster / easier / less complex way of screwing in the lightbulb than what you've told them. A method which all other participants in the forum are conspiring to keep secret from them.

 

[palbano]

If it is a Java forum, "Zero"... the Jini does that for you.

-pete

 

[johnwm]

There will always be at least one from the MS apologist, pointing to Q12345678, where it's noted that the lightbulb was not in fact faulty and redefining the concept of 'Darkness' as an intrinsic 'Property' of <Litebulbs (T)MS 1988>

________________________________________________________________
If you want to get the best response to a question, please check out FAQ222-2244 first

'People who live in windowed environments shouldn't cast pointers.'

 

[Marcs41]

dwarfthrower you know that should not be asked in these forums, there is a potential illegal use of light bulbs with that information. We wouldn't want to get sued!

 

[dwarfthrower]

Of course marcs41 we need to include the script-kiddie light-bulb users who want to know how to make their light-bulb do something really annoying like;
[ul][li]pop back on automatically when switched off,[/li][li]switch on half a dozen other light-bulbs when first switched on,[/li][li]make their light-bulb opaque so people can't look inside it to see how a light-bulb works, or[/li][li]make their light-bulb the default light-bulb for all light-bulb users who happen to look at their light-bulb[/li][/ul]
Then thirty odd sanctimonious light-bulb users to flame the script-kiddies for wanting to be rude with light-bulbs.

Then half a dozen to insist that it's a technical light-bulb discussion and the merits of what should and should-not be done with lightbulbs has absolutely no bearing on what is and is not possible, and would be better directed at the light-bulb ethics forum.

Then a few more to flame those posters for giving script-kiddies information which they may or may not use for good or nefarious purposes.

 

[Marcs41]

Oops, the light went out, must be a cheap light bulb, now I am in the dark and trying to ifdn hte kyes no hte eykbaodr ot tyep the rets

 

[KenCunningham]

To my mind lightbulbs were the finest example of built-in obsolescence before Windows came along.

 

[gurner]

And 1 member to start this posting and completly under-estimate the response to it in a matter of hours.

superb

 

[jrbarnett]

How about one member to ask about the merits of the new digital DVI lightbulb connector which sends the electrical signals digitally rather than the older analogue screw in or bayonet systems?

 

[Marcs41]

Girth, you should have posted is as a Tip, with the

 

[onpnt]

2 &quot;Newbie lightbulb changers&quot; to say the lightbulb must be changed and it's urgent.

1H 1K 10 3D 3F 3E 3K 38 3J 10 1T 10 3G 3L 3I 35 10 35 3O 33 35 3C 3C 35 3E 33 35

 

[benlinkknilneb]

...and, of course, 6 people to RF the post because &quot;Tek-Tips is for professionals; making fun of light bulbs is unproductive, it could hurt the feelings of the light bulb involved, and it shouldn't be included in the fora&quot;

 

[CajunCenturion]

I appreciate your help, but that's not what I want to do. I don't want to change the light bulb, I want to install a new filament.

Good Luck
--------------
As a circle of light increases so does the circumference of darkness around it. - Albert Einstein

 

[onpnt]

NO, YOURE STILL NOT UNDERSTANDING ME.

I WANT A NEW LIGHTBULB BUILT FOR ME. I DON'T CARE HOW IT IS ASSEMBLED!!!!!

but, thanks anyways.



1H 1K 10 3D 3F 3E 3K 38 3J 10 1T 10 3G 3L 3I 35 10 35 3O 33 35 3C 3C 35 3E 33 35

 

[Error7]

I tried wiring a light bulb to a 12 volt car battery.

Must have got the + and - the wrong way round 'cause the room went darker!

 

[bgill]

Would the last person to leave this thread please turn off the lights

 

[CajunCenturion]

Would you please post a new one for me - it's very urgent.

Good Luck
--------------
As a circle of light increases so does the circumference of darkness around it. - Albert Einstein