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SilentAiche

Technical User
Dec 21, 2004
1,325
US
Ceremony to Cure Illiteracy: The "can't write right rite"

Ceremony to Cure Aviation Pioneers' Illiteracy: the "why can't the Wrights write right rite?"

Percolate: "not making the coffee on time"

Party-giver Reminders: "Host-It Notes"

Sediment: "Speaking as a breath freshener...

detriment: "Anything that makes your breath worse...

Enjoy!

THanks,
Tim
 
Tracy and Boca,

I'll bet that learning a couple of phrases like, "I love you", "Merry Christmas & Happy New Year" come in very handy in foreign business meetings.

I remember several years ago (when I was an Oracle instructor), I was teaching a class in Manhattan. I was aware that we had a few international students that had flown in for the class. During class introductions, I noticed one student with a distinctively foreign name. Taking a chance that he was one of the foreign students, I asked him, "Are you here from Italy?"

He answered, "Uh, more or less."

"Are you staying here beyond the class to do any sight-seeing?"

"Uh, more or less."

"Are you travelling with colleagues?"

"Uh, more or less."

"Do you understand anything I'm saying?"

"Uh, more or less."

Finally, realising that my questions might not be getting me the quality of the results I wanted, I asked, "What town are you from in Italy?"

"Uh, more or less."

At that point, I could tell that it was going to be a looooong class.

[santa]Mufasa
(aka Dave of Sandy, Utah, USA)

Do you use Oracle and live or work in Utah, USA?
Then click here to join Utah Oracle Users Group on Tek-Tips.
 

[blue]Redundancy[/blue]: getting letter after letter after letter demanding payment for the ballet lessons.

Tim



[blue]__________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
[/blue]
 

[blue]Aspire[/blue]: hoping to one day be a butt.

Tim



[blue]__________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
[/blue]
 

or, in hiney sight, perhaps [blue]aspire[/blue] refers to the hope that one day you'll be an Egyptian snake atop a church in Dublin...


Tim




[blue]__________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
[/blue]
 
[blue]amphibian droppings[/blue]: frog poop, generally believed to taste like chicken manure (the discovery of which led to the phrase "frog in your throat" - but that's a hoarse of a different collar).

The intrepid investigator's name has been lost to history, so he[red]*[/red] is usually referred to in academic texts as "[green]old warts his name[/green]."

Professor Tim

[red]*[/red] What, you think a woman could have made such a brilliant discovery???




[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
Tim: WHERE do you come up with those???

You must be even more "eccentric" (read "twisted") than I am!


Tracy Dryden

Meddle not in the affairs of dragons,
For you are crunchy, and good with mustard. [dragon]
 
Tracy,

A rhetorical question, I know, but here goes:

Short Answer: [green]Bacardi[/green]
"Rum for Improvement" and all that.

Other: I've always had a knack for quickly connecting words/ideas/etc. I have no idea where it comes from.

Example: A former co-worker came back from two months of training in Georgia. He told a tale of playing softball with his fellow trainees during off-time. He mentioned that he always took off his wedding band while at bat.

Another co-worker asked, "Why"?

My immediate response was, "He was trying to pick up a single."


How many times, in a given lifetime, will you get the chance to connect baseball and marriage? I live for those moments.

Tim



[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
Whatever it is, don't lose it! I get a chuckle out of one of your horrible (i.e. wonderful) puns at least once a day.

I seem to come up with them more often in conversation than I do when writing.


Tracy Dryden

Meddle not in the affairs of dragons,
For you are crunchy, and good with mustard. [dragon]
 
If you have a rapier wit, does that mean you have pointed head? I also have a warped sense of humor, but since I work in tech support, it is an advantage. Anyone read Spider Robinson? "Beware the dock side of the farce".



BocaBurger
<===========================||////////////////|0
The pen is mightier than the sword, but the sword hurts more!
 

If you have a rapier wit, does that mean you have pointed head?

Actually, yes, but the point is in the middle. Very odd.

There are several of my breed - we refer to ourselves as the "[blue]Peeramids[/blue]."

Tim

[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
Lunatic - moon pendant to a sun-dial
Caliphornicator - Arab prince with large harem.
Wristling - quarrel as performed in a nonviolent forum
Gigle - musical performance for laughably small audience

[tongue]

[blue]An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind. - "Mahatma" Mohandas K. Gandhi[/blue]
 
Gee---the best I can come up with:

Armadillo

Possum on a half shell


Okay, you really have to have experienced the South to appreciate it.
 
LOL yanqui.

Possumburger - slow possom on I-95.



BocaBurger
<===========================||////////////////|0
The pen is mightier than the sword, but the sword hurts more!
 
[blue]Armadillo[/blue][sup]2[/sup]: providing a gun to a pickle.

Tim

(apologies to yanqui)
smile.gif


[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
[blue]Amarillo[/blue]: how to shoot a Texan's toes

Tim

[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
[blue]Tallyvision[/blue]: broadcasts you can count on.

(okay, okay, maybe this was an unabashed "bump")

Like you've never eaten chicken...

Tim, perhaps.

[blue]_____________________________________________________
If you need immediate assistance, please raise your hand.
If you are outside of Raleigh, raise your hand and say
[/blue] [red]Ooh! Ooh![/red]
 
Tellavision: when your little brother sees you doing something you aren't supposed to and tattles to your mother.


Tracy Dryden

Meddle not in the affairs of dragons,
For you are crunchy, and good with mustard. [dragon]
 
Orr Tellyvision - watching old reruns of Kojak.

Good Luck
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