Words of wisdom we've heard over Airline PA systems 18

[SantaMufasa]

I got such a laugh out of Golom's post in the "Speed vs. Velocity" thread:

In a few minutes we will be landing in <pick your favorite third-world city>
Please set your watches back 2,000 years.

...that I thought we needed to give some "air time" to other airline gems, without hijacking the other thread. One of my favourites:

"...Should we experience a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will appear above your head. Place the mask over your nose and mouth, and breathe normally. If you normally do not breathe normally, then breathe as you normally would when you normally do not breathe normally.

What others have you heard?


Mufasa
(aka Dave of Sandy, Utah, USA)
[I can provide you with low-cost, remote Database Administration services: see our website and contact me via www.dasages.com]

 

[Lunatic]

1. Site is NSFW
2. I appologize in advance if like the destination.

http://www.overheardeverywhere.com/archives/000451.html

Male flight attendant: This will be a miserable flight. It'll be really turbulent and then we'll end up in New Jersey.

Flight into Newark Airport

***************************************
Have a problem with my spelling or grammar? Please refer all complaints to my English teacher:
Ralphy "Me fail English? That's unpossible." Wiggum

 

[gbaughma]

OMG....

If I ever have a kid, I'm going to send them to Catholic school. I went to Catholic school and I feel I got a gooder education.

Just my 2¢
-ARRGH! All my clothes are wrinkled! Oh, the irony!

--Greg

http://parallel.tzo.com

 

[kjv1611]

[ROFL2]

gbaugma,

That is two funny quote!

--

"If to err is human, then I must be some kind of human!" -Me

 

[thekl0wn]

Coming back from spring break in Cancun a few years ago, a guy boarded our plane, stewardess in-arms, Hawaiian shirt on, half unbuttoned, and a pilot hat... He stood in the front of the plane, and announced, "I'm Captain Bob, and I'll be flying this rig today." We all laughed, until he turned and we to the cockpit, extinguishing the thought he was just another drunken passenger, and was indeed going to be flying that 727.

We did make very good time, however. We made it from Cancun to St. Louis over an hour faster than our trip down there, and that was even including missing the runway due to turbulence once. (we didn't actually miss it, but tell people we did. It was more of a high-speed fly-by of the tower!)

 

[Lunatic]

gbaughma,

First thing I do on Mondays at work. I arrive 20 minutes early just so I can catch up with all the stuff added over the weekend. It really helps ;p

And every 2 or 3 days there is a quotation like that... that makes you just stop and stare, not sure whether you should double over laughing or start crying, or both.

***************************************
Have a problem with my spelling or grammar? Please refer all complaints to my English teacher:
Ralphy "Me fail English? That's unpossible." Wiggum

 

[thekl0wn]

From my experience, apparently the Catholic education must be better... I dated a Jr. High teacher from a local public school, and she used the term, "more gooder" quite often. I finally had to ask about her unique phrase, and she said she knew it should really be, "more better," but that just didn't sound right to her. Thank God she taught Algebra!

 

[SantaMufasa]

Thank God she taught Algebra!

...and did she end up burning her Alge-bra?

Mufasa
(aka Dave of Sandy, Utah, USA)
[I provide low-cost, remote Database Administration services: www.dasages.com]

 

[Rofeu]

An Algae-bra???? Strange images come to mind.

 

[AnotherHiggins]

Pilot: Sit back and relax! We'll be in Indy in about an hour and 55 minutes. [Mic clicks off, then back on.] Uh... We'll be in Boston. You know where you're going.
[tab]-From

http://www.overheardeverywhere.com

(Site contains crude language)

[tt]_____
[blue]-John[/blue][/tt]
[tab][red]The plural of anecdote is not data[/red]

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[ncotton]

"Remeber when you were a kid, and you went on holiday with your family. You always used to play that eye-spy game with your brother when you were on the plane.

'OK, my turn. I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with L R'

'Errr.... Luggage Rack?'

'No'

"Errr..... I don't know. I give up"

"LOOSE RIVETS!!!!"

Neil J Cotton
Technical Consultant
Anix Group Ltd