Team Building exercises to relieve tension 5

[jancebk]

Hello:

I am managing a team of several technical people on a technical software development project. This is a new project, only a few weeks into it, and there are already personality conflicts developing. (Egos clashing... you know the drill....)

I'd like suggestions for some team building exercises that we can do in our team meetings that only take 15 minutes or so, but are fun, get to know each other types of exercises that help relieve the tension so we can get back to dealing with the project!

Thank you in advance for your time!
Jan

 

[BJCooperIT]

Have everyone write on a slip of paper something they do in their spare time that most of their co-workers might not know. Put the papers in a box, shake well, have each person draw a slip (hopefully not their own). Each person then guesses whose slip they have. Amazing to learn that your DBA built his house or that a developer rescues greyhounds or your analyst was at Woodstock! (select * from life where brain is not null)
Consultant/Custom Forms & PL/SQL - Oracle 8.1.7 - Windows 2000

 

[LesleyW]

We used to take it in turns to chair the team meeting. At the end of each meeting, we would have a silly competition to see who would chair the next one (the loser had to chair). Something like racing a remote controlled car round the table. Whoever chaired decided what the game was and was exempted for the next week. It's amazing how inventive some of the games got, and it was great fun.

 

[BJCooperIT]

Upon reflection I should have added a bit more to my post. The exercise I mentioned above is more than just fun. It can build bonds between folks who find they have a common interest such as fishing or listening to jazz. It can create empathy for the person who leaves promptly at 5:00 while everyone else stays late (who knew they were the care-giver for a parent with Alzheimers?). It also can build respect for the single parent or the volunteer at Habitat for Humanity. It can create tolerance for the person whose child has a potentially fatal genetic disorder.

Several of the situations above have happened to me. You find that when you understand the stress that someone else lives with you are more willing to let a grumpy morning pass by without comment. You can offer encouragement where it is appreciated. At the very least, you might find something to ask the other person about in friendly conversation.
(select * from life where brain is not null)
Consultant/Custom Forms & PL/SQL - Oracle 8.1.7 - Windows 2000

 

[jancebk]

Thank you Lesley & BJ - these are great ideas! I'm welcome to more...

What I plan to do is have the group activity as a regular part of the weekly meeting, so that it can be a bit of fun the team anticipates.

Other ideas I've had - each person brings in a baby picture of themselves and we have to guess who is who...

The team is fairly small at the moment (6 members) but has the potential to grow over the next few months, depending upon new contract work.

I hope others can benefit from these posts as well!

Jan

 

[mmorancbt]

My consulting company would often work on projects where political battles would sometimes arise.

One thing we found very diffusing was to recognize (not in name always) the existence of these various opinions and power struggles. We would try to do so in a light and humorous manner.

This did a lot to diffuse tension because people could see their own political manouvering as something readily understood and recognized. We would use our own consultants as examples: kind of a protest from within, so they saw that we wanted to have success so that we got more work and could be more profitable.

We had our own agenda, recognized and exposed it. That way, if someone decided to start any kind of back-stabbing or behind the scenes talk about how we promoted our own company while on the job, they knew that we knew we did so as well.

In any case, it's less of an exercise and more of a method.

I hope it's helpful. Matthew Moran

 

[KornGeek]

Jan,
The baby pictures idea may not be a good one if you're having personality conflicts. That can be fun if people are getting along, but when the atmosphere is tense, it is often seen as pointless and silly.

One thing we do at our weekly meetings is to have an acknowledgement time where people can acknowledge their co-workers for something they did during the week that was above and beyond their normal duties. This can be anything such as handling a problematic customer well, finding a elusive bug in software, staying late to get a project completed, etc. The point is that often, people aren't aware of some of the things that are going on around them. This can bring about an appreciation for the work others are doing.

Also, we allow people to acknowledge themselves. This is because people often do things that nobody notices, or that gets forgotten before the next meeting. The self-acknowledgement works well, but the problem is that many people aren't comfortable "tooting their own horn".

I have some other exercises somewhere. I'll have to dig them out.

 

[BJCooperIT]

The baby picture game is fun, especially if you give a small prize for whoever guesses the most right answers. This can be a prize that gets recycled as the prize for each game you play!

One of the more serious techniques I learned by being a foster parent is the "Team Circle". This is used when relationships are becoming strained. Use a timer and everyone sits around the table. Make sure everyone understands the ground rules.
1. Each person has 3 minutes to talk about how they feel.
2. No comments may be made as accusations (no "You did that" or "You are a jerk!", instead "When that was done I felt...."
3. No one may interrupt the speaker during their time
4. No one may say "You don't feel...", feelings are neither right or wrong they just [/i]are[/i]. The things on which we base our feelings may be flawed, but don't tell them how they feel.
5. At the end, if emotions are calm, you can take time to correct any misconceptions and lay a game plan on how to keep issues from cropping up again. If folks are too upset then have everyone prepare a list for the next meeting on how they might be able to help the team moral.

One of the best tricks I ever learned was on how to deal with an upset kid (this works well with adults too!).
1. Ask the upset person what it is they want. Sometimes they don't even know. It forces them to think about the situation and put it into words.
2. Ask them if their behaviour is getting them what they want? This may sound simple. but actually is very powerful.

If I have a problem with a co-worker and am pounding them with requests that are going unanswered:
"What do you want?"
"Well, I want them to respond to me and get things done."
"Is griping about how slow they are getting you that?"
"No, I guess not."
"What can you do to help get what you want?"
"Perhaps I can organize my requests into one concise list that is prioritized. That way they can see everything I need instead of me sending them 7 separate e-mails."

Progress!
(select * from life where brain is not null)
Consultant/Custom Forms & PL/SQL - Oracle 8.1.7 - Windows 2000

 

[jancebk]

KornGeek:
I agree that the baby picture thing could be silly - it's something I plan to use a few weeks into this when (hopefully!!) the tensions have diffused a bit and the team has had more opportunity to bond. At that point they should be able to get a kick out of looking at each other's baby pictures.

I did have an ad-hoc meeting yesterday to clear the air a bit, similar to what BJ has suggested, each person got to address how they "feel". Although it was uncomfortable at moments, I believe it helped a bit.

My intent of using the team building activities is to:
a) help them learn more about each other
b) interject a bit of fun into the day.

Thanks again for your input... very valuable!

Jan

 

[olded]

Jan:

I think before you implement any team building exercise that you evaluate the people in your group. Some might resent spending time on something that is not work related and productive. From experience, I can tell you that busy, focused software developers rarely respond well to make shift team building exercises. ("Go Bowling? Yeah, I already spend 8+ hours a day with you guys!&quot

The only really safe team building exercise I've experienced is what KornGeek suggested: Acknowledging co-workers on a job well done, going the extra mile, etc.


Regards,


Ed

 

[squash]

Just a couple of quick thoughts on things I have used over and over and over, with success.

Every meeting give everyone the floor for say 2 minutes. Yes set a timer.
Set Some ground rules ( here are some ex.).
No one else can inturupt.
Cannot put down a co-worker during this time.
Cannot put you down during this time.
You must take your 2 min even if silent.
When its not your turn u must pay attention to who's it is, even if they are silent.

This gets off to a slow start but over time has amazing results. And I'm sorry to say there is no quick fix for what you are facing.

The second thought is to end every meeting with an appreciation. Single out one person in the group for everyone in the group to say a short appreciation of.
Don't forget to include yourself from time to time.
Ex.
I like how Jim always responds to e-mail.
I like how sally is alway to work early.
The key is sincerity. And if your team is expected to do this at every meeting they will start to look for them between meetings so they will be prepared ( nice eh?).

Good luck, be persistant and positive. Basically most people want to get along and just need your guidance.

Doug

 

[jancebk]

Here's what we did for this week's meeting...
I am a PM for a consulting organization, and my entire team is made up of contractors, so combined there are a vast number of experiences on numerous projects. I decided to capitalize on the common experience of being at a client site and having something go awry...
I had each person share an "impelmentation horror story" from a project earlier in their career. It got everyone laughing, took about 10 - 15 minutes and then we were able to get down to business with smiles on our faces and realizing that what we are dealing with at the moment isn't quite so bad...
My personal story was early in my career (early 1980's)... Going to a client site where the sales person had done a "smoke & mirrors" job, and now I was expected to make it work. I was also there to install a circuit board. It was on a mini-computer that could use multiple programming langugages, but what he sold them didn't have the cabablitiy of doing the type of communications they wanted to do. The client was hopping mad at me when I told him he didn't have the proper software and he would have to purchase more in order to do what he wanted to do. He basically called me an idiot because "Frank said it was possible". He called Frank (the sales guy), learned that I was RIGHT and then angrily told me to just install the damn circuit board. I was so nervous by that point I installed it upside down.. which then literally "smoked" when we powered the machine back on. I blamed it on a bad board and never confessed that it was my fault it blew up...

Thank you for your suggestions, and keep them coming!
Jan

 

[EdwardMartinIII]

I and a group try to get together for lunch once a week. Nothing big, just pizza, or soup (Vietnamese beef noodle sooooooup!). The rule is, no one can talk about work.

Everybody's doing things that aren't related to work and that get them jazzed. My own personal job is to keep in mind the various things that get people jazzed, and bring those things up during lunch. But see, I like that sort of thing because I like working with people who have a lot of passion for life -- that kind of energy usually makes for a better product and a better work environment. One co-worker likes to talk politics, especially comparing our politics to his home Germany. One has a 5-yo who makes up elaborate games and teaches the neighbor kids (we're learning Chrononauts because he dug it). One plays rock and roll. One has stepped into a lotta' kids situation. One likes to ride broncos. One wants to be an animator "when he grows down".

We talk about this stuff over lunch so it doesn't take away from our private lives. Interactions -- even the rough ones -- are much smoother and more friendly. And yeah, there are occasional times when people talk about non-work-related stuff.

A friend of mine from Brataslava said that it is very common where he works to knock off around 2pm, spend about a half hour sitting around with coffee talking about the day's projects over coffee, then they go back to work for a few more hours. he says everybody's usually pretty happy in those last couple of hours and they go home to their families happy, too.

Cheers,


Edward

Like Lovecraft? Know Photoshop? Got time for the Unspeakable?

http://www.petting-zoo.org/Movies_Dreamquest.html

 

[lionelhill]

Nice selection of things here. I particularly like that several people have appreciated that "silly games", while highly suitable for some people, can really alienate others, and should be used only with appreciation of the people involved. And there are work-related alternatives (like the horror story one, or discussing openly the different opinions). Also a lot of people resent team building that intrudes on their personal time (expectation to spend every Friday evening in the bar when you've really had enough of the place by then).
My personal hatred is getting poked and prodded by "strangers" so corporate bonding exercises like getting too many people to stand on too small a piece of wood (yes, people pay to be told to do this!) just make me cringe.

 

[jancebk]

I appreciate all the input and hope others can benefit from it as well.

I wasn't really looking for the type of team building exercises that take a day to do and a "stranger" facilitates. I agree that those can seem forced and are often difficult to translate back into the real world of work.

What I'm looking for are quick things we can do that take 10 - 15 minutes and help break the tension. (Such as sharing the implementation horror stories.) I don't do this at every meeting and I just slip them in when I think the team needs one; we've done a few of them and the group always ends up laughing and ready to get back to work. I firmly believe that a group that can laugh together works so much better together...

We have had a couple of team lunches as well, and the rule is "no talking about work" if they want me to pay for it...

Thank you again!
Jan