No problem. I only spent about 20 minutes of my time giving you the original answer, which WAS the answer, right? ... (hmmm, what's my hourly rate... oh, nm).
I was pretty proud of that answer, too - I'm not 95th percentile material on everything I do, but on that question I believe I was.
I assumed you knew SQL when I answered. I didn't expect I'd need get into those basics. Basically, I just don't have time to answer the bonus question, sorry.
Sorry to hear that it's rough out there. But I stand by my advice: if you're going to mess with SQL specifics, uhhh, well, kind of learn SQL. I can't teach you how to do SQL in the time that I have to answer this post. But you'll be grateful when you do learn it, if you want to be an exotic Access problem-solving guru.
Good luck - really. -------
"What is your favourite colour?" "Blue! No! Yell"