Favorite Stand-Up Comics

[acl03]

In another thread, a few of went off on a short tangent about David Cross. I thought it would be fun to share our top favorite stand-up comics.

List your favorite three, and yry not to repeat any that are already mentioned unless you feel absolutely compelled.

My 3 (in no particular order):

Brian Regan - He is the best comic I have ever heard that does not have ANY dirty material.

Mitch Hedberg - "If you have a friend who is a tightrope walker and he trips on the sidewalk, that is completely unacceptable."

Dane Cook - A little dirty at times, but his energy and delivery make him great.





Thanks,
Andrew

Hard work often pays off over time, but procrastination pays off right now!

 

[Stella001]

John Caparulo - This guy had me laughing though his whole show, will for sure go see him again!!

 

[KenCunningham]

The late great Bill Hicks of course, but from this side of the pond (UK) it has to be Billy Connelly (early doors) for me.

Some days are diamonds, some days are rocks - make sure most are the former.

 

[jebenson]

Patton Oswalt - VERY blue, but also very funny
Mitch Hedberg - a big second on Mr. Hedberg. RIP Mitch.
Lewis Black - his last name describes much of his humor.

and of course, who could forget:

George Carlin - you know you've had an impact when the FCC creates new indecency standards in response to your material. RIP George.


I used to rock and roll every night and party every day. Then it was every other day. Now I'm lucky if I can find 30 minutes a week in which to get funky. - Homer Simpson

Arrrr, mateys! Ye needs ta be preparin' yerselves fer Talk Like a Pirate Day!

 

[HarleyQuinn]

My three (well four) from the UK in no particular order:

Russell Howard

Mark Watson

Noel Fielding/Frankie Boyle (couldn't decide )

HarleyQuinn
---------------------------------
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[acl03]

I don't think I know of know many (hmm...make that any) comics from the UK. I will have to check some of these out.

Thanks,
Andrew

Hard work often pays off over time, but procrastination pays off right now!

 

[AnotherHiggins]

I love Brian Regan. One of my favorites.

And RIP, Mitch Hedberg

I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."

I also like Jim Gaffigan.

There is the vegetarian Hot Pocket for those of us who don't want to eat meat, but would still like diarrhea.

Oh, and I really like Louis C.K. He's very dirty, but very, very funny. I can't find a clip (it would probably be too dirty to link to even if I could), but he's got a great bit about relationships that goes something like,

After you've been dating for a long time, you think, 'I've got too much time invested here. I can't leave.'

Then you get married and it suddenly occurs to you 'S*$#, not that I want to leave her, but now I'm stuck! I can't leave even if I want to'.

Then you have kids and you realize, 'f*$*!! NOW I'm stuck! I could have left at any time before. The door was right there!'

[tt][blue]-John[/blue][/tt]
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[acl03]

Louis C.K. is hilarious. One of the funniest bits I have ever heard was him talking about his bank account. I'd try to paraphrase it, but it's a bit long and way better. Just search for it on youtube, I'm sure it's there.



Thanks,
Andrew

Hard work often pays off over time, but procrastination pays off right now!

 

[Bandenjamin]

I'll add another George Carlin,

Some that are missing

Rychard Pryor, Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock, Bill Cosby, Steve Martin, Dave Chappelle, Ron White....Oh how could I ever pick just 3?

--Dan
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
Mark Twain

 

[addy]

From the UK it would be:

Jack Dee
Michael McIntyre
Mark Watson

 

[gbaughma]

Jeff Dunham
Robin Williams
Eddie Murphy



Just my 2¢

"What the captain doesn't realize is that we've secretly replaced his Dilithium Crystals with new Folger's Crystals."

--Greg

http://parallel.tzo.com

 

[GSCaupling]

1) Jeff Dunham (a ventriloquist - check out "Arguing with Myself)

2) Mitch Hedberg - didn't know he was dead...

3) Ron White


GS

[small][navy]**********************^*********************
I always know where people are going to sit. I'm chairvoyant.[/navy][/small]

 

[KornGeek]

Like many of you, I have trouble limiting it to just 3. However, 3 that have not been mentioned:

1) Charles Fleischer - Best known for the voice of Roger Rabbit, but is very good at improvising his entire routine based off interactions with the audience.
2) Mitch Fatel - His comedy is great, and his delivery makes it better.
3) Steven Wright - Hilariously funny comments in a monotone voice, which makes them even funnier by the contrast.

Also, I join those of you with a fondness for George Carlin. I was just watching a movie with him a few nights ago and commenting how he is missed. His humor would be nice to have in these difficult times.

 

[AnotherHiggins]

I somehow managed to miss the 'top 3' bit in the OP. I was just agreeing with two that had been mentioned and adding 1 new one.

I couldn't limit it down to just 3 anyway, but, for the record, the 3 in my previous post aren't my 'top 3'. I'm just sayin'.

[tt][blue]-John[/blue][/tt]
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[KornGeek]

Another one that I was just discussing with a coworker is Dennis Miller. Far more intellectual and thought-provoking than your typical comics, he is wonderful with political commentary and discussion of world events. (IMHO, the Saturday Night Live pseudo-news report Weekend Update was at its best with him.)

 

[LeeMcCauslin]

As for UK comics, Eddie Izzard is one of my favorites.

Most of my other favorites have already been mentioned here (Carlin, Hedburg, Jim Gaffigan slays me, Ron White (He is light years ahead of his blue collar brethren. I don't feel they deserve to be in the same arena as Ron) and Bill Hicks is/was just heroic to me.)

Funny this thread was brought up since I just so happen to be killing time before going off to see the Rescue Me comedy tour tonight. Dennis Leary, Adam Ferrara and Lenny Clark. Never seen any of them live before so I'll check in with a review tomorrow.

One comedian I might catch a rash for listing is Carrot Top. I know I know - he seems pretty goofy on TV and his late night talk show bits are often just silly but I got to see him live several years back and I promise you his live show absolutely kills. I missed some of jokes because I was laughing so hard at the previous ones. His TV bits are MUCH tamer than his live show.

And, because nobody has mentioned a female comedian yet, Sarah Silverman tickles my fancy in ways that would be inappropriate to enumerate here.

So there's my three unrepeated comedians:
Eddie Izzard
Carrot Top
Sarah Silverman

We'll see if Dennis and his gang can move up the list.

"Dyin'? Boy, He can have this little life any time He wants to. Do Ya hear that? Are ya hearin' it? Come on. You're welcome to it, Ol' Timer. Let me know You're up there. Come on. Love me, hate me, kill me, anything. Just let me know it... I'm just standin' in the rain talkin' to myself."

 

[acl03]

I can't believe I forgot about Norm Macdonald. He is an obvious replacement for Dane Cook in my "top 3"



Thanks,
Andrew

Hard work often pays off over time, but procrastination pays off right now!

 

[Opieo]

While I would not specifically pick any 3, I do like Brian Regan, Mitch Hedberg, and Dane Cook as well.


(sorry if this isn't exact, I just searched for some online)

Mitch - I bought a donut, and they gave me a receipt. When will I ever need to prove I bought a donut? To some skeptical friend: "Hey man! Don't you even act like I didn't buy this donut! I have the receipt... damn ... I forgot it... at home... in the filing cabinet... under D... for donut."

Dane Cook - Did you see that clip they were like showing the other day on uh ESPN
or whatever. They were showing like the best crazy accidents or something.
It was like the best of the worst car you know like.
They showed this one clip man . If you saw this this was nuts.
The two cars go around the corner and they like catch each other
they start to roll. The tire flys into the stands, hit's a woman in the face!
And when you first saw it you were like OOOOOO!
That tire just hit that woman in the in the face!
Oh good they're showin' it again Look Look Look Look at this right here.
Slow it down..yeah that's when it hits her in the face.
And the funny thing is everybody around the lady like dove out of there.
Everyone got out of there but she just like sits there like.
You see everyone dives and at the last minute as the tire is rocketing at her
face. This is her defense. She goes OOOOO!
Like she's just gonna get in a slap fight with a Goodyear.
Like she's just gonna go PAH and deflect it.
Or maybe she just palmed it PAH.
There can only be one Highlander! Tires cannot defeat me!
What a horrible way to go...What happened to Mary?
A tire... hit her in the face. How do you say that without laughing.
A tire- I can't even do it now! How did Mary die? A TIRE hit her in the FACE!
What was she doing putting her face near tires?
No no no no this tire hunted Mary down. This tire murdered Mary.
... (this one line omitted)
This tire was out for vengeance.

Brian Regan - “What’s the plural for moose?”
“Moosen! I saw a flock of MOOSEN! There were many of ‘em. Many much moosen. Out in the woods…in the wood-es…in the woodsen. The meese want the food in the woodesen…food is the eatenesen…the meese want the food in the woodesenes…food in the woodesenes.”
“Brian. Brian! You’re an imbecile.”
“Imbecilen!”

Sorry for posting all sections, but I hope you enjoy them as much as I do. =)



~
“Your request is not unlike your lower intestine: stinky, and loaded with danger.” — Ace Ventura.

 

[acl03]

Wow, I just read my original post. How is it that I wasn't scolded for all those spelling errors!?

My excuse is I hadn't had my coffee yet!

Thanks,
Andrew

Hard work often pays off over time, but procrastination pays off right now!

 

[LeeMcCauslin]

Update - Dennis Leary is dirty sunnuvagun. Pretty funny though. Adam Ferrara was very funny but didn't get enough time - he was the last one up but it seemed the shortest. Lenny Clark was not very funny. There was another guy (Kenny something.) who wasn't named on the bill but I gather he is also on that Rescue Me show. He was OK.

All in all, I'm glad I got the tickets for free. None of them are bumping the the top comedians already mentioned in this thread.

Leary's band, The Enablers, played a few songs before the show and a few more in between sets and those songs were mostly funny. Good thing they displayed the lyrics on the big monitors above the stage...not very many of them are repeatable here though. ;o)

"Dyin'? Boy, He can have this little life any time He wants to. Do Ya hear that? Are ya hearin' it? Come on. You're welcome to it, Ol' Timer. Let me know You're up there. Come on. Love me, hate me, kill me, anything. Just let me know it... I'm just standin' in the rain talkin' to myself."