Difficult Coworkers 4

[kHz]

I have worked with difficult coworkers before, but presently I am working with one that is completely impossible to work with.

Here are some true examples:

Another coworker needed some help from the difficult coworker, which was around the time for difficult to leave -
Other coworker: Is it about time for you to leave? Or do you have time to show me something?
Difficult coworker: Yes.
Other coworker: (pauses 5 seconds waiting for the rest - which doesn't come) Yes what?

Another time there was a problem in a Linux program that was causing some wrong numbers in iostat.
Me: There must be a bug in the Linux code for that program.
Difficult coworker: A bug? There is a bug in the software? How did that get in there? What kind of bug is it? A bug. I have never heard of that before. A bug?

In a meeting there was a discussion of whether to buy a certain model of Dell servers.
Another coworker: We can buy this model of Dell servers instead of staying with what we currently have.
Difficult coworker: Dell is coming out with another model that does (this this this).
Other coworker: Really. When are they available? We should buy those.
Difficult coworker: Well they aren't out yet. Not sure they ever will be or when. I read an article that said they wanted to do this in that model.

Said something about large databases.
Me: That is a large database to have on that server.
Difficult coworker: A large database? What is a large database?
Me: Number of users, disk space, table rows, number of tables.
Difficult coworker: I don't know what a large database is. I have never heard that. A small database and a large database? What is that?

He knows Linux commands and states he has worked on it for 10 years. But he doesn't understand the VMM or other aspects of Linux and performance.
Me: The system time is probably high because there are a number of cache misses that leads to clock cycles being chewed up.
Difficult coworker: Ok. I don't have any idea what you just said.

Another coworker asked me a question, something the difficult coworker had done.
Another coworker: How did that get installed and taken care of?
Me: I didn't do it. You should ask the difficult coworker because he did it.
Other coworker: I don't want to ask him because he will yell at me.

Another coworker has said jokingly to the difficult coworker before that he needs customer relation skills. I don't think it sinks into the difficult coworkers head that this is truthful but just said jokingly so he doesn't blow up.

There are many, many, many, other examples like that. And he can never be wrong and if he says one thing and you disagree then his face gets red and he just blows up.

This happened when we were discussing a NCAA Division I football player's transfer to another college. I said that he would have to sit out a year because of NCAA rules. The difficult coworker said that he only had to sit out if the coaches wanted him to sit out. I replied, "no, NCAA rules state Division I to Division I transfers have to sit out a year." He just blew up.

I have just never worked with anyone so volatile before, yet at times he can be nice. You just never know. One morning another coworker wanted to ask him a question and he grumbled something. The other coworker said "are you in a bad mood this morning?" He said "no."

Anybody else ever work with someone like this and how you dealt with them?

 

[philhege]

Right on, Dollie. EQ is as crucial a metric of professional success as are IQ, training, etc., especially when success demands cooperating with and encouraging others.

My EQ isn't the highest, so I really can't bitch about anyone else, but recognition is the first step to rehabilitation, knamean?

I just hope the subject of this thread learns to grow up in all facets of his personhood. Or, be faced with an army of clones in his next life ;^)

Phil Hegedusich
Senior Programmer/Analyst
IIMAK

http://www.iimak.com

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I'll have the roast duck with the mango salsa.

 

[gbaughma]

Difficult coworker: ^$&#!%*&
You: That* behaviour is childish, unhelpful and does not reflect well on you as a professional.
* not "your"

That, IMHO, is the most constructive thing that you can do.

Remember these goals:
Target the BEHAVIOR, not the PERSON.

-- There's a *BIG* difference between saying "Your an a$$hole" and "You're acting like an a$$hole". The second one is the behavior that can be changed. The first is a statement about them PERSONALLY.

Keep the goal in mind
The goal should be to have a better co-worker. If your goal is to "put him in his place" or "get rid of him", you need to re-evaluate your motives.
This goes for ALL managers. Any kind of corrective action should have the goal of redirection and re-education, with the ultimate goal of having a better employee.

Don't lower yourself
Don't get into head-butting matches with the person. Redirection in a positive and professional manner is always best, and keeps you from getting "dragged in" and possibly reprimanded yourself.

Remember to use "I" Language
This keeps the focus on your perception and feelings about the situation, instead of putting the person in a defensive stance. You're telling him how YOU feel about behaviors.



Just my 2¢

"What the captain doesn't realize is that we've secretly exchanged his dilithium crystals for new Folger's Crystals." -- My Sister
--Greg

http://parallel.tzo.com