I did figure out a way to do this!!!
If you go into the IIS Service Manager. (mmc for IIS). You have to go in and under the message delivery section, you have to add a smart host. The smart host is the host will full DNS name resolution (or so I have read, thats what it says it is). Well what your going to want to put in there is your main mail server. Such as this: <mailservername>.<domain>.<internetURL>
So if my network was on the 'mountaindew' domain, and we were at 'pepsi.com' and my mail server name was 'mail01' i would do this in the smart host configuration:
mail01.mountaindew.pepsi.com
and then check the DNS (there is a little button for that to check it, to see if it resolves properly). Well I did that, and now it will try to send the email and if the current computer cannot find DNS resolution, it will send it to the mail server, and then it will send the email.
I'm now getting emails in the company and out of the company.
Bueno!
if you have any questions, put'm down, i'll see if I can help.
donn