This part of one of your replies "" I guesss I'm not quite technical enough to understand how to "run memory timings less aggressively and turn off all the fast writes" ""
implies that you suspect tampering with the memory timings.
But your memory description is absent....
The obvious thing to do if you suspect tampering of timing is to load BIOS default values settings in BIOS...
You could also be mixing memory modules in an undesireable/wrong way.
Rule 1 : If you board supports more than one type of memory then NEVER run more than one type at a time. (e.g. do not mix SD-RAM with DDR-RAM modules)
Rule 2 : Always check your manual to see if your board supports the RAM type you use (not all boards can run both double side and single side modules and not all boards are equally satisfied with specific mixes)
Rule 3 : There are features about RAM such as electrical differences varying from manufacturer to manufacturer (Especially pre DDR) and these features seems undocumented therefore though you have done your "homework" you can always get a problem anyway even so bad that your computer won't start with a specific module installed. (in that case get a module from another producer)
Rule 4 : To check if your system has got a problem with a specific module then install one module at a time and boot your computer and use with each module alone.
Rule 5 : If system acts flaky and you wish to see if a module tests defective on your system then you may use Memtest86 (
)
Rule 6 : Some older NON-intel chipset have problems if you use more System memory than 500 MB , especially if you also use graphics cards with like 16MB RAM and up.... this is due to some overlapping of memory adress control space in windows. (use 500MB or less System Memory)
Regards...