Lighten that Load!

[TamedTech]

Good morning Chapps,

I've been sat here this morning, staring at the reflexion in my coffe mug contenplating the prospect of another day de-bugging my CSS ... and needed a little pick-me-up.

After a little routing around, I found the solution! ... however the fact that i not only understand these jokes, but also find them hillarious probably explains why i dont have a girlfriend lol.

Thought you could brighten up your day with a quick chuckle, so here, for your viewing pleasure ... Web Geek Jokes and Insults!

Feel free to add / comment if you wish!

Rob

Web Developer Jokes
------------------------

Q: Why did the XHTML actress turn down an Oscar?
A: Because she refused to be involved in the presentation.

Q: Why was the font tag an orphan?
A: Because it didn't have a font-family.

Q: Why do CSS designers have too many children?
A: Because they employ lots of child selectors.

Q: Why was IE5's 3-metre wide cell in the insane asylum smaller than IE6's 3-metre wide cell?
A: Because the width of the cell included the padding.

Q: Why was the XHTML bird an invalid?
A: Because it wasn't nested properly.

Q: Why was the decapitated web page an invalid?
A: Because it didn't have a head.

Q: What did the silly web developer order at the restaraunt?
A: Tag Soup!

Q: Why is there no H7?
A: H6 is a afraid of H7 because H7 H8 H9

Q: Why couldn't the webpage get a girlfriend?
A: Because it had no <style>

Geek insults
----------------

"Yo momma is just like a web page... a teenie little head and a big fat body."

Yo mamma is so ugly, if she had a webpage it would say, "Best not viewed on any browser!

 

[UncleMortis]

LOL, oh dear, we had a thing for <div> tags at one stage, I made a pirate in flash with a <div> bird on his shoulder moving across a beach to the music of captain pugwash...

 

[tsdragon]

I really need a life: I understood and liked those!

My favorite really obscure tech joke:

"Did you hear about the new object-oriented version of COBOL? It's call 'Post-Increment COBOL by One'".

Tracy Dryden

Meddle not in the affairs of dragons,
For you are crunchy, and good with mustard.

 

[TamedTech]

lol .. Thanks for that Tracy,

I think my favourite tech joke of the moment, and i have this printed on T-Shirt ...

"There are only 10 types of people in this world.... those that understand binary, and those that don't!"

Thanks,

Rob

 

[tsdragon]

TamedTech: I like that one too. There's a TT-er that has used that for a sig line. Here's another sig line I like:

"If man were intended to work in hexadecimal, how come we only have A fingers?"

Tracy Dryden

Meddle not in the affairs of dragons,
For you are crunchy, and good with mustard.

 

[johnwm]

Guilty as charged, Sir. Up till about November 02 (thread222-395670 for instance) I used 'There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.'

I have used the quote (which I believe to be original, and so not strictly a quote) in my current sig since around 2003

________________________________________________________________
If you want to get the best response to a question, please check out FAQ222-2244 first.
'If we're supposed to work in Hex, why have we only got A fingers?'
Drive a Steam Roller

 

[BillyRayPreachersSon]

El Reg have been selling that on T-Shirts from their Cash 'n' Carrion store for ages now:

http://www.cashncarrion.co.uk/technodepot/685/0

[tt]Dan's Page [blue]@[/blue] Code Couch

http://www.codecouch.com/dan/

[/tt]

 

[TamedTech]

lol .. thanks for that guys ... that cashcarrion is superb ... *now where did i put my credit card!?*

Rob