AGP and Direct3D acceleration not enabled when I installed Radeon 9700

[AKAConal]

I've seen a similar problem addressed here, but none of the solutions worked, so I'm posting my specifics

Here's the Problem:
NO accleration is enabled...SMARTGART reports that this card doesn't support Direct3D or AGP acceleration, which is ridiculous

In DXDIAG all 3 acceleration choices under the display tab are "Not Available" and greyed out

System:
-Asus A7V266 (newest BIOS installed (1011)) VIA chipset with newest drivers installed
-1.3 Athlon TBird
-256 DDR PC 133
-20G HD NTFS with OS on it, primary
-40G HD Maxtor FAT32, slave
-ATI Radeon 9700 Pro (newest Catalyst drivers installed, as well as DirectX9.0a)
-Turtle Beach Santa Cruz sound card
-NETGEAR 10/100 network card
-Windows XP
-extra cooling fan
-300W PS


Here's what I've done:
Flashed the BIOS with newest version
Installed latest vid card and chipset drivers
reinstalled Directx9.0
Tried to manually turn on acceleration in SMARTGART
set the AGP aperture size to 128 in BIOS
enable, and disable AGP Fast Write in BIOS
made sure in safe mode that no "extra" drivers were present
physically removed and reinstalled the card
and...All the above in different orders....

Please help, I'm losin' it....

Conal