I think you want to use a UNION operation on 2 queries.
Q1: get all the people who are ID1 where ID2 = "myID"
Q2: get all the people who are ID2 where ID1 = "myID"
Thus:
select T1.name, T2.relationship
from T1 join T2 on T1.id = T2.id1
where T2.id2 = ?
UNION
select...
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